We do some strange things when we don't like the way our life is going.Too often we blame ( 责怪 ) someone else. “ I wish my parents were more understanding. ” “ I have such a bad chemistry teacher ! ” “ My friends are so boring and self­centered.They make my life worse and worse. ” Blame! Blame! Blame! It seems natural to sing this self­pitying song , but the truth is, if you don't like your life , you should do something about it.No one else knows exactly how you feel or what you need.No one can read your mind correctly.You are the only one with the power to change your life , and if you want it to be different, you can change what you're doing. When you're in trouble, don't give away your power to decide how you feel about yourself.Choose how you want to think and act.Other people can't make you unhappy or angry.They only act in their own way and then it's up to you to decide how you will respond( 回应 ) . For example, your friends go out to lunch without you and you feel very angry.How are you going to act? You may blame your friends, “ They are not kind.Who needs them anyway ? ” Or you may tell your friends how you feel, listen to their explanation, and let them know you'd like to be invited next time. When you decide everything in your own way, you're getting hold of your own life and shaping ( 塑造 ) it according to your tastes and feelings.You can choose to be happy, to make friends and to build an interesting life.When you blame others for what is or isn't happening in your life, you have stopped growing or learning. One of the most important rules is that you can never change another person by your direct action.The only person you have the right to change is yourself.Once you change, the other person has something different to respond to and change is possible.If you want change in your life , begin with yourself.